About Me

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I'm Carole, living in London, happily married and mum to two amazing boys.I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Rectal Cancer in April 2010. Surgery took place in November 2010 and I now have a permanent colostomy...Spinal mets were then diagnosed in October 2011...In January 2012 I was told of further spread to the hip area (multiple lesions)..My life expectancy is now 6-9 months. Walk alongside me on the last part of my experience with this..

Friday, 29 October 2010

Thank you to Mum and Dad.......

Mum, Dad - just wanted to say 'Thank You' for the gift of the supplements - so very appreciated as you know.

Also for the lovely serving dishes which will look fantastic when Rab cooks his two Christmas lunches this year.

I know I'm such a miserable cow at times and I know I take it out on people closest to me - you sometimes get the brunt of my grumpiness and snappy moods - and I'm genuinely sorry!

It's just that sometimes I simply don't want to even think about this blasted 'thing' called cancer.

I'm aware that you only ask because you care and I'll try to be more patient with you both - but the day I become totally perfect will probably be my last on earth - in the meantime I'll carry on and just do my best eh :-)

Hugs to you - both for loving me and forgiving me, always xxxx


  1. Hi Carole.

    I confess to not reading all your blog in detail, but have read much of it and browsed the rest. You must by now be an expert on hospitals, but waiting for the surgery is a toughie. I'm assuming that after the surgery you will probably be in ICU or HDU for a bit? I may be going to give you tips you already have, but I was anticipating being in HDU after my resection and had no experience of this, either as a patient or visitor. A friend whose daughter had been in ICU and HDU after spinal surgery gave me some great tips. She found it very hot, so I took in not only cool wipes and a flannel but an empty plastic atomiser to fill with water and spray at my face and also a little battery operated hand held fan. She advised us at pre-op to find out if the hospital had an option to buy week long parking tickets, instead of trying to find small change on a daily basis. They did, and it was one less worry for hub at visiting time. She also suggested we check if the ward (the ordinary one once out of HDU) had a lounge with microwave for either self or visitors to prepare tasty snacks. Sadly it didnt and I was envious of those patients whose families brought in tasty small meals when they were able to eat, as the hospital food was pretty grim. I took in as many toiletry 'smellies' as would fit in my bag for when ready for bed bath or shower/hairwash. The nurses loved my aromatic gels for washing! There was a lady about our age having a TIPPS shunt fitted and she too had lots of smellies including DKNY perfume - gorgeous and made us feel fresh again.
    I found the ordinary ward very noisy 24/7 and relied on earphones plugged into the bedside TV (dont forget cash for that) blotted out the noise. An ipod would work as well.
    Also the friend advised that not all the nurses would be nice, and how right she was. One took an instant dislike to me because i was opposite the nurses station and she was on nights when I was uncomfortable and fidgety. She clearly said in my hearing i was 'doing her head in'. Tip is to ignore them and build up a relationship with the nice ones.

  2. Lovely Carole! I am sure your loved ones feel your pain with you. And understand. As parents, we know how often we would have given anything to 'take' our childrens pain as our own.
    Bless you

  3. Hi Fiona,

    Many thanks for the great tips - you can never be too prepared I reckon. I wouldn't have thought to take a small fan, now on my (ever growing) list of things to pack :-)

    Your comment about the horrid nurse made me laugh - If they moan about me 'doing their head in' they'll be in for a really hard time for sure :-)

    Last time I was in hospital (back in 2004) the night nurses used to take turns to sleep whilst on duty.
    One night, one of them was asleep in a back room and the other one left the ward completely for over half an hour.
    During this time an old lady opposite me became distressed and tried to get into bed with me (I'm laughing now thinking about it but at the time.....) :-(

    Day staff were much nicer than the night ones for some reason.

  4. Very observant re the night versus day nurses. The day I woke up on the 'normal' ward I realised I couldn't reach my call button as it was on a wall hook and I couldn't move. Only had a mouse like whisper for calling out due to NG tube soreness etc. Nurses had a knack of not making eye contact with patients when walking past. So I thought, if I disconnect my SATS machine it will bleep that my oxygen or blood pressure levels are low and someone will come running. Then I can ask for my call button. Took 30 minutes of machine bleeping for anyone to come! When hub came to visit he commented on my having strapped my PCA pain pump and my call button to my wrists I was so anxious about them falling off the bed and not being able to get help to get them back!

  5. Carole love , we will always love you whatever moods you might have , we do understand why, and just wish we could make it all better for you .
    glad the dishes will come in handy , better on your table than sitting in my cupboard,eh.big hug Mum and Dad xxxxx