About Me

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I'm Carole, living in London, happily married and mum to two amazing boys.I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Rectal Cancer in April 2010. Surgery took place in November 2010 and I now have a permanent colostomy...Spinal mets were then diagnosed in October 2011...In January 2012 I was told of further spread to the hip area (multiple lesions)..My life expectancy is now 6-9 months. Walk alongside me on the last part of my experience with this..

Wednesday, 29 December 2010

Rab's Christmas Dinner/s........

As I mentioned in earlier posts this year Rab was responsible for cooking the two Christmas meals for everyone.
When we discussed this earlier in the year I wasn't sure how mobile I'd be or how much I'd be able to do and I pondered on the idea of going to mum's instead or eating out...Rab immediately said 'I'll do Christmas, you can just supervise me'.

Okay, I admit, I was amazed. I always do all the cooking, preparing, and organising for Christmas - he's always organised the table. It has always been that way - but this year Rab took charge.

On Christmas day we had mum, dad, Sarah and Manolis over for Christmas lunch - so in total there were 7 of us.
Rab prepared vegetables, sorted out the roast beef, got himself a time plan going for things like cooking the Yorkshire puddings and he did really well. I was able to do more than I'd envisaged but the main jobs were all done by him.

Boxing day we had all the same people plus James and Leanne - so 9 of us. Turkey was put in around 9.30am and I stayed in bed until midday (!!) whilst Rab just got on with preparing the vegetables and organising his table for later.
Although I was able to do more than expected, Rab did the vast majority of preparing and with some supervision, cooking too.
I usually end up totally exhausted Christmas evening (not complaining at all - just stating facts, I like doing Christmas and it's a 'nice' exhausted)...but this year I was just normal tired - and Rab was exhausted.

I'm really proud of how he's coped since I was diagnosed. He doesn't say much at times, but that is his coping mechanism....
Whilst I was in hospital he coped brilliantly - remember this is a man who had never used the washing machine before, never mind ran a household...he got himself a washing rota going so that Dj's uniform was washed and ready, ironed all the school shirts, cleaned, shopped and cooked and visited me daily.
Dj didn't miss a single day of school whilst all this mess was going on, Rab kept him on track.

Since I've been out of hospital, Rab's had to go back to work (sometimes working stupid hours) but has continued to cook meals at home and make sure he's doing anything that I've not been able to do.
Now, he's done Christmas too....and then he went back to work on Monday at 6.30am..:-(

Anyway to finish up I'll just add that he even had time to dress up as 'Santa' to make Dj laugh....

And this was Rab after wearing the costume for 10 minutes..'Tired out Santa'..:-)


  1. That's one handsome Santa!!

    Well done Rabah. You clearly did a brilliant job with the two Christmas lunches you had to cope with. So very proud of how you've managed everything and worked the stupid hours that you generally do during December. xx

  2. I am in awe of this man...he has not left your side for one moment...we hear of so called men on CC that can't handle the pressure and leave their wives at the time when they need them most - I find it so difficult to comprehend when a partner is going through the worst time of their lives and their partner cant handle it...NOT Rabah...he is a true hero and I look forward to meeting this man one day...

    Sana sa'eedah! Happy New Year!

    Tony xx

  3. So true Tony, so many times I've read about someone who has decided *this* would be a good time to tell my partner I'm leaving her...unbelievable really and so very sad.

    Rab's been a constant practical support - as I've said before, he's a man of few words but what he does say always makes a difference. However words are easy, actions make the real difference.

    Goes without saying that we are all meeting up one day soon - hopefully Spring when it's warmer in your neck of the woods.
    In true Southern style I don't venture further than Watford in the winter :-)