- I'm Carole, living in London, happily married and mum to two amazing boys.I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Rectal Cancer in April 2010. Surgery took place in November 2010 and I now have a permanent colostomy...Spinal mets were then diagnosed in October 2011...In January 2012 I was told of further spread to the hip area (multiple lesions)..My life expectancy is now 6-9 months. Walk alongside me on the last part of my experience with this..
Tuesday, 18 January 2011
Tea with the Queen...
I'm dedicating this particular post to Dj.
When all this cancer stuff first started going on Dj was 10 yrs old. He transferred to Secondary School in August amidst all the hospital tests, chemo, radiation, scans, appointments, me in severe pain and uncertainty. He had just turned 11 when he started....
So with all this going on at home, he could easily have played the cancer card 'Can't cope because my mums got cancer, Can't do my homework on time, Can't concentrate, Can't behave, Can't cope with the transition from primary to secondary, Can't settle'........ but he didn't do any of the above.
He knuckled down, worked hard at primary to get good results in his SAT's and left with an excellent school report then started at his new school in September.
During his first term of being there I was then in hospital for my surgery, this involved huge changes to his routine at home but he didn't miss a single day of school, handed all of his homework in on time, adjusted to his new routine and made new friends and quickly gained the respect of his tutor who recently described him as 'a very mature, sensible and balanced young man who has quickly proved himself as a role model'
Today we received his first term levels in each subject...
(PG = Progress Good; PE = Progress Excellent; PS = Progress Satisfactory; PU = Progress Unsatisfactory)
Dance PE !!! (Those who know Dj will understand the !!!)
Drama PE !!! (same as above)
Oh and his reading age is 16 yrs and 4 months now - 5 yrs older than him.... :-)
I am so very very proud of him along with Rab and the rest of the family. He is an example of exactly how not to let cancer rule our lives.
And....now to explain the tea with the Queen title....Okay, okay I confess, it's not REALLY the Queen!
He has been invited to attend a tea party with the Headteacher tomorrow afternoon which is being held in honour of students who have made outstanding effort in subjects (his 'speciality' was Geography).
For each of the subjects listed above, the school choose one child from each year group (a year group contains approximately 200 children) who excelled in that subject and invite them to this special afternoon tea so that the Head can get to meet them and get to know them better. When you've got in excess of 1000 kids in a school, it's fairly impossible to get to know them all well, especially during the first term - so I think this is a great idea.
In addition a newsletter was sent home to all parents and he's so impressed to see HIS name there:
Headteacher Commendations : 'Dj ** Geography - for commitment to the subject and always working hard'
As I said we're so proud of him....and I even forgive him for driving me to distraction at times. I know he's had a lot to deal with but he's proved that life goes on regardless.
One of Dj's main gripes at Primary school was that good behaviour and hard work wasn't recognised anywhere near as often as rewarding those whose behaviour was often less than desirable.
He often used to feel it was unjust when a 'bad' kid got rewarded for stuff that the rest of them did without question each day. Simple things like getting through the day without hitting another child got them a reward.
The children who behaved all the time found it was getting more and more difficult to accumulate enough reward stickers to be able to exchange them for gold certificates, meanwhile they were sitting in assemblies watching kids who generally can't behave or follow easy rules picking up their gold certificates.
He said to me once 'If I was a brat I'd have my gold certificate by now'...I see his point.
I do understand the incentive in rewarding children when they've managed to achieve something (like not attacking 'my' child that day)...however I also felt that you also need to recognise the 'good' kids.
I like that this current school is more into rewarding positive behaviour and recognising hard work - rather than 'improved behaviour'.
I like that my boy is going to tea with the Queen tomorrow (yes, yes...I know...but she is the Queen of the school)
Well done Dj xxx